Wednesday 11 April 2018

Session 175 - Baby Just Say Yes

Despite (or due to?) having only two players, the ascent from the halls of Moldus Vane goes well! The druggies are just chilling down there, supplied with drugs by the charitable demon Julgoor, and Moldus Vane seems to have some sort of special deal with the tentacles to let him live down there.
And excitingly, character drama ensues when our lovestruck heroes return to the library...

POWERLAD renews his vows.
Galaxy Johnson feels the wrath of a woman scorned.



​- Charles depicts the D R A M A (line art version of page 2 incoming next week)




- Ollie gives deep insight into Mattgate
hewasanextraithoughtkillingextraswaspartofthefunimsorryyy


Session 175 - Baby Just Say Yes

Campaign Date:
Tuesday, 2 March, 1601
Moon Phase: Waning Gibbous
Zodiac: Aquarius

Enemies Defeated:
- Arach-Nacha again, in a sense (250 exp) 
Total: 250 exp

Treasure and Equipment:
- 6 wraps of Notcoke (300 exp)
Total: 300 exp

Exploration:
- 2 random encounters (100 exp)
Total: 100 exp

Events:
- Isen Heisenberg looks at the broken wall of his room in shock and awe. POWERLAD is framed in the breach, the removed rock hovering in front of the rune glowing in his hand. (50 exp)
- Entering Isen's room through the actual door, Galaxy Johnson witnesses the same sight! Also, somehow, the rest of the party has left to do something else somewhere. (50 exp)
- Looking between the destroyed wall on one side and the creepy grey alien man on the other, Isen is confused as hell but very happy to talk! (50 exp)
- He says he has completed the ritual to attain his final apotheosis in the dragon cult, becoming immune to all poisons and diseases and capable of converting his body into a deadly poisonous gas. (50 exp)
- His plan - finish the development of his tentacle-destroying omnipoison, consume it, then descend to as deep a point on Shub-Niggurath as he can before deploying said omnipoison. There are ways down deep accessible from this complex. (50 exp)
- "Simple!" he says, before snorting a line of white powder. Galaxy Johnson and POWERLAD look at each other with no small amount of worry for his mental state. (50 exp)
- Looking around, his chemistry lab is basically made up of inventively combined drug paraphernalia. Bongs as flasks, crack pipe test tubes, that sort of thing. (50 exp)
- They ask him if he needs anything to complete his experiments, and he tells them that back at his lab on the service there are several vials of distilled poison he'd like. Also, a more pure supply of that poison POWERLAD gave him before would be amazing. Also some more coke would be juuuuuust fantastic. (50 exp)
- He'd go up to get the stuff himself, but he is so so ashamed. He had imagined himself emerging as a hero as the tentacles were destroyed by poison. He was meant to save the world, not destroy it! If only he'd done more tests! The shame is overwhelming. (50 exp)
- He offers to let them stay the night in this room, and the pair gratefully accept. (50 exp)
- POWERLAD puts the wall back, but not without attempting a new neat trick - creating stuff! He pulls a great hammer from the very stone, brushing off the rock to reveal the shape that was in there all along! (50 exp)



- They sleep on piles of rags on the floor, Isen Heisenberg working through the night. (50 exp)
--- The Next Day
- In the morning, POWERLAD does the rune trick again, the Devotion of Ninhursag allowing him to create some extra weapons for Galaxy Johnson. While these stone weapons are fragile, they are effective! (50 exp)
- They thank the dozing Heisenberg and go to find Moldus Vane, the leader of this place. He gives them directions and a rolled up parchment with his seal on it to prove their story. (50 exp)


- Crossing a massive cavern with a squirming ceiling, they approach a couple of spear-wielding guards asleep on the job. (50 exp)
- They convince one that he's forgotten to ring the morning gong! Alarmed, that guy runs off to do that! The other, seeing Heisenberg's seal, escorts them in to announce them to Moldus Vane. (50 exp)
- Through an entry chamber and a tapestry room, they are shown to some double doors which are thrown open! A large pillared room that looks to have been scooped out of the stone by writhing tentacles! (50 exp)
- And at the other end of the room on a stone throne held by a mass of thick tentacles, finally, after all these years - Moldus Vane himself! (50 exp)
- He's real old, unsurprisingly, and smoking a long golden pipe. The distinctive grassy scent of otherpot floats through the air. (50 exp)
It's hard to explain just how wonderful and peaceful and loving it was to be in the Mould. Together with his followers, they were one with the Gods and one with each other. It was wonderful. Then, one day, the Mould disappeared and they were all thrust into this horrible apocalypse. They lost so much more than they can say (50 exp)
- To fill that void, drugs! 
He's the leader of all these committed Zeanists, a holy hard-partying apocalypse cult inspired by the teachings of the prophet Zea. Charles looks pleased and disturbed, it was his character that started this. (50 exp)
- Moldus Vane motions them forwards. Drugged up guards hiding behind the pillars withdraw to his throne and stand down. (50 exp)
- How does he control the tentacles? He says he's got a good relationship with the tentacle cultists. He occasionally sends them people and supplies, in exchange the tentacles don't attack his charges. This area has connections to the veins of the earth deep below, so it's helpful to the tentacultists to have a neutral ground close to the surface. (50 exp)
- POWERLAD tells him about Blood Honey. It's a lovely drug, surely of interest? He passes over his gold pipe, allowing some blood honey to be dripped into the bowl. He's totally sold! The combo of otherpot and blood honey sends him to a higher state. (50 exp)



- He murmurs something about the dealer needing to get a supply of this stuff, and POWERLAD spots a business opportunity! Where can they find this guy? (50 exp)
- Moldus languidly waves them in the right direction and the pair head back towards the private dormitories. They knock on a door... and a masked man opens it! (50 exp)
- Incense wafts out into the hallway, framing a lithe man with coppery skin, lavish robes, and a golden mask. Jewels glimmer in his eyes, and as he speaks the mask shifts between expressions. Now welcoming, now serious, now pleased. (50 exp)
- His name is Julgoor and, naturally, he is a demon. He welcomes the two into his hazy room of cushions and cloth-hung walls. Shelves of exotic substances, hanging bronze braziers curling with sweet-smelling smoke, a large soft bed of overstuffed pillows upon which vague figures laze and mutter in quiet voices. (50 exp)
- Blood Honey, you say? Why! A supply of such a sought-after and exotic substance would be wonderful! A deal is struck to assist Julgoor and gain a guaranteed buyer for the product! (50 exp)
- He graciously allows POWERLAD to try some of his supply. The first taste is free after all... He's also willing to give out drugs for free in exchange for future favours. POWERLAD takes him up on that, asking for 6 doses of Notcoke. (50 exp)
- Julgoor artfully apportions the powder into six identical wraps and brushes POWERLAD's face as he hands over the goods. A faint six-pointed mark blossoms where he touches. There are no other consequences though... (50 exp)
- They head to Isen Heisenberg's room and POWERLAD gives him three of the doses. Isen is very grateful! He offers to give POWERLAD a sermon on Ninhursag's poisonous graces, and POWERLAD gratefully agrees. (50 exp)
- Ninhursag smiles upon POWERLAD, who gains the power of the Claws of Ninhursag! The ability to surge the green dragon's latent power once a day, doubling in size and gaining a powerful unarmed attack! (50 exp)
- They head off for the surface, crossing the bridge over the toad monster uneventfully. Beneath the surface, the monster chokes fitfully as it fights over the poison. (50 exp)
- Guards with spears pointing inwards guard the exit. Luckily Heisenberg's letter is accepted, and they continue. (50 exp)
- The pool with the dead eel swarms with white grubs that plop from the writhing ceiling, but POWERLAD uses his dragon-rune powers to create stepping stones from the very walls! (50 exp)



- Travelling upwards and outwards, the friendly guards waiting in the false mine escort the pair back out of the tentacle-ridden Biohazard zone and towards the library. (50 exp)
- On the way, they hear a shout from a star-struck jeweler. He yells that he'll give a special discount to POWERLAD and his companions! Galaxy Johnson is stoked and buys a torc to use as a ring when he proposes to the spider queen. POWERLAD buys a tasteful silver skull necklace as a gift for Bertha. (50 exp)
--- The Library
- Speaking of Bertha, she's angry! She's standing on the steps of the library, flanked by the winged shape of none other than Andromeda! She smirks down at POWERLAD as Bertha yells. (50 exp)
- POWERLAD tries to explain over Bertha's shouts to leave her alone and give her some space. POWERLAD's spider pregnancy was one thing, but a gay orgy in a four dimensional art gallery?! Why didn't he tell her!?(50 exp)
- She flings the latest saucy novella at POWERLAD and slams the door. POWERLAD and the Four Dimensional Orgy lands at his feet. POWERLAD is still buzzing off the coke though and impulsively runs towards the door, goes BIG, and smashes it open! (50 exp)
- "I TOLD YOU TO GIVE ME SPACE!" yells Bertha as she runs deeper into the library. Andromeda follows her, alternately shout expletives at POWERLAD and comforting her friend. Apparently they're mates now? (50 exp)
- They're heading for where the spider queen is hidden! "My queeeeen!" whispers Galaxy Johnson and pursues with POWERLAD. Old Man Henderson finally catches up from wherever he's been and pursues too! (50 exp)
- The pursuit ends at a door that's been hastily left ajar. Sounds of Andromeda comforting Bertha can be heard from inside. (50 exp)
- Galaxy Johnson activates his squicky spider powers, crawls into a shadow, and sneakily crawls out of a shadow above a bookcase inside the room. He can see both women and also the big sack containing Arach-Nacha his queeeen! (50 exp)
- POWERLAD turns on heartbeat vision and sees... only Bertha and Galaxy Johnson?! Peeking through the keyhole, Andromeda has no heartbeat to speak of. What the hell. (50 exp)
- Galaxy Johnson crawls down from his perch, making little attempt at sneakiness, and opens up the sack! Inside is... books?! (50 exp)
- The fuck is going on. Where is his queeeeen?! Andromeda hears him, spins, and angrily rushes at Galaxy! Bertha staggers backwards... (50 exp)
- ... and backs into POWERLAD! He burst through the door at the first sound of trouble, and he catches Bertha before she can fall over. She tears herself away and backs into the aisle between two bookcases, her face full of conflicting emotion. (50 exp)
- Galaxy Johnson is horrified to see Andromeda's fingers extend into pale black-veined talons. She swipes at his face, but Galaxy stumbles over the sack of books and narrowly avoids the claws. (50 exp)
- Old Man Henderson charges through the door, past the sobbing Bertha and conflicted POWERLAD, and sweeps Andromeda's legs from under her! (50 exp)
- Andromeda spins, landing on her back with her head staring up at Galaxy Johnson. "You just had to go and FUCK IT UP!" she shouts... and transforms. (50 exp)
- A black mask emerges from under her chin and slides down over her face, enormous black chitinous legs burst from her chest, her lower body swells and grows, the mask grows eight eyes and cherry-red lips, her hands are encased in glossy black, and the monstrous form of Arach-Nacha emerges gruesomely before Galaxy Johnson's very eyes! (50 exp)
- "It was going so well too," she says with some regret as she bites at Galaxy Johnson. He nearly avoids the blow, but one of the fangs embeds itself in his shoulder, pumping black poison into his veins. (50 exp)
- Unheeding, POWERLAD is trying his hardest to explain the events of the art gallery orgy to Bertha. It was magic gone awry! I've always been truthful with you otherwise, you know that this sort of thing happens in my line of work. You have to believe me Bertha! (50 exp)
- "I have secrets too POWERLAD!" she says, nearly confessing her secret past to her husband, but is cut off when POWERLAD desperately falls to one knee... (50 exp)
- Galaxy Johnson is dying. He reaches into his pocket and withdraws the torc he bought from the jewellery shop. He speaks his last words... (50 exp)
- "Will you marry me... my queen?" (50 exp)
- The spider queen is suddenly overcome with regret and horror at what she's done! "Yesss of courssse Galaxxy! You will bear my many childrennn! Pleassse, hold on for meee!" (50 exp)
- She kisses him as his life begins to slip away, her long tongue emerging from between her lips and snaking down his throat... (50 exp)
- Simultaneously, POWERLAD is on one knee in front of Bertha. "I was too drunk to remember asking you to marry me the first time", he says, pulling the necklace from his pocket, "I wish this was a ring but... Bertha, will you marry me?" (50 exp)
- I can't fucking handle these delicious character stakes. (50 exp)
- Bertha tears up, "yes yes of course yes!" (50 exp)
- Galaxy Johnson's eyes open. He's got those eight beautiful unblinking eyes staring into his, and her gorgeously long tongue squirming around in his belly. The poison immunity! He's alive! (50 exp)
- He barely gags as her tongue slides back up and out of his throat. The lump of eggs in his belly gives him comfort and warmth. Her smooth black hands hold him gently. It's a fucked up relationship, but it's his. (50 exp)
- Old Man Henderson is caught between joy and horror, quietly hides his bloodstained halberd behind his back, and slips out of the door in the hopes that everyone will forget he just stabbed Galaxy Johnson's new fiancee. Congratulations to the happy couples! 🎉🎉🎉🎉 (50 exp)
Total: 3300 exp

Misc:
- Absolutely Disgusting bonus (50 exp)
- Antagonist Appeaser bonus (50 exp)
- Classic Charles bonus (50 exp)
- Diplomancy bonus (50 exp)
- Fame bonus (50 exp)
- Freudian bonus (50 exp)
- Noblebright bonus (50 exp)
- Poison is OP bonus (50 exp)
- Pundemonium bonus (50 exp)
- Shunga bonus (50 exp)
- Soap Opera bonus (50 exp)
- Pacifism bonus (500 exp) 
Total: 1050 exp

Party Roles and Individual Exp:
- Remembrancer (Charles / Galaxy Johnson - 100 exp)
- Caller (Kitty / POWERLAD - 100 exp)
- Treasurer (Charles / Galaxy Johnson - 100 exp)
- Guard ( Kitty / POWERLAD - 100 exp)
- Art Attack bonus (Charles, Ollie - 100 exp ea.)- Attacco d'Arte bonus (Charles - 100 exp)
- Artapalooza bonus (Charles - 100 exp)
- Chippo Man bonus (Kitty*2 - 100 exp ea.)
- JÜGBRINGYR bonus (Charles - 500 exp)

Active Businesses:
- Honey Healing. Safe. 1106sp. (Bertha)
- Knickers Gloves Bodices. Risky. 1030sp. (Ratimir)
- Blood Honey 4 U. Safe. 515sp. (Sir Robyn) 

Rumours:
-

Death Toll and Injuries:
- None!

Exp Totals:
- Kitty / POWERLAD!, Level 7 Muscle Wizard: 87761 (Level up at 144000)-- Devotee of Ninhursag, Bond 8 (-40% exp)
- Charles / Galaxy Johnson, Level 5 Elf (Alpdrucke): 40209 (Level up at 48000)
--- Old Man Henderson, Level 0 Octogenarian


Absent or Retired:
- Tom / Clarence Eclair, Level 3 Specialist: 3040 (Level up at 6000)
- Tom / Aces Fontaine, Level 1 Specialist: 869 (Level up at 1500)
- Kitty / Bertha, Level 4 Necromancer: 9931 (Level up at 18000)
- Imran / Friar, Level 1 Magic User: 1040 (Level up at 2250)
- Andy / Carrie Meleste, Level 5 Cleric: 25557 (Level up at 28000)
- Yuri / Bjorn Gunnerson, Level 2 Barbarian: 2278 (Level up at 4000)
- Sunni / Larry's Legends, Level 1 Extras: 758 (Level up at 1500)
- Fraser / Tippin, Level 1 Ratman: 1458 (Level up at 1500)
- Charles / Zena, Level 6 Fighter: 41566 (Level up at 64000)
- Tom / Meteor Power Shower, Level 2 Barbarian: 3061 (Level up at 4000)
- Nix's Retainer
--- Huz, Level 0 Hireling
- Tom / Spicy Mac, Level 2 Halfling: 3457 (Level up at 4000)
- Eleanor / Mugg, Level 2 Fighter: 2357 (Level up at 4000)
- Kyle / Gimlass the Brave, Level 2 Dwarf: 2257 (Level up at 4400)
- Amar / Amar's Cleric, Level 1 Cleric: 1413 (Level up at 1750)
- Henry / Henry's Next Character: +2084 exp
- Ollie / Tremendo Picante, Level 2 Ratman: 2654 (Level up at 3000)
- James / Raaf van Held, Level 4 Fighter: 14838 (Level up at 16000)
- Eglė / Bob, Level 1 Dwarf: 434 (Level up at 2200)
- Will / Cecil Fulbright, Level 5 Cleric (Termaxian): 15063 (Level up at 28000)
- James / William Fox-Shitt, Level 3 Cleric (Zeanist): 4571 (Level up at 7000)

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